hello mtv welcome to my crib
You know just a dildo on the wall.
where else is the parrot going to sit?
relevant to my interest.
it’s a cockatiel
You are so used to your features, you don’t know how beautiful you look to a stranger.
I can’t believe I’m even more beautiful than I think I am this is incredible where’s my modeling contract
Sam Smith - I’m Not The Only One featuring Dianna Agron and Chris Messina.
no one saw me wear it therefore it is not dirty
Alternatively: everyone saw me wear it yesterday, but I own a washing machine so I could’ve washed it since then (I didn’t wash it).
people saw me wearing it yesterday but there will be different people seeing me today therefore it is not dirty
alternatively: wash ur damn clothes
I hate playing “never have I ever” because I’m a fucking slut
I hate playing “never have I ever” because I’m a fucking virgin
you will never know which of these two statements reign true for people who reblogs this and that bothers me
I have to say the Kim k app was an amazing business idea and I feel like it has already done wonders for her brand. Now I see pictures of Kim kardashian and I think “that’s my extremely generous friend Kim she really got my modeling career off the ground”
How is sponge bob a sponge if everyone in his family are chocolate chip cookies
"I squeeze Tris’s hand, praying that if i do it hard enough, i will send life back into her body and she will flush with color and wake up. I don’t know how long it takes for me to realize that isn’t going yo happen, that she is gone. But when i do i feel all the strength go out of me, and i fall to my knees beside the table and i think i cry, then, or at least i want to, and everything inside me screams for just one more kiss, one more word, one more glance, one more."-Tobias Eaton; Allegiant (via thesheoshow)
Do not fall in love with people like me. I will take you to museums, and parks, and I will take you to the candy shop. I’ll let you lick the lolly pop. Go ahead girl and don’t you stop. Keep going until you hit the spot (WHOA).